Kelly McCullough

This cell will never hold me copper!

Does anyone want to explain to him that he’s on the outside?

Napping here.

Look at that plasterwork…

If I wanted to talk to anyone I wouldn’t be hiding in this tunnel.

*singing* Cousins, we’re identical cousins…

…the everloving hell?!

I can never unsee that…

You think it was traumatic for you…? Try being me.

That’s a taste you can’t get out of your mouth.

I actually think do kind of look alike…from this perspective.

This special episode of bonus pets brought to you by…ME ME ME!

That was a mother fluffin’ dawg!

What Are Dawg?

It starts with D and the rhymes with T and the stands for TROUBLE.

Yeah, trouble is my middle…my middle! Rub my middle!

Prepare to fire port side cannons, me hearties!

I think he may be taking his black beard a little too seriously.

Yeah, he does that. Look at the boat he cast me adrift in.

Is this a spider I see before me, it’s mandibles toward my paw?

Yeparoo! I am spider QUEEN!

Srsly? That thing is like the size of my pinky claw…tip. Chillax.

Hokay. Gzzzzzznorkzzzzzzz

Now you know why I sleep on another floor.

You are, each and every one of you, very very strange.

DRAMATIC ANGLE IS DRAMATIC

Chill my dudes. What’s that even about?

It’s all about the nip, ’bout the nip…

Cactus nip?

Y’all, I just cannot.

You’re not alone.

…I’m not?! Is it my tail again?

‘Bout the nip, ’bout the nip…

I have you now, my pretty, and your little orange tail too!

OMFSM, is Oddgrr doomed?!

Srsly? I just slipped out the back, Jack.

MAGIC!

Idiots. I’m surrounded by idiots. This will be fixed when I’m in charge.

Am I a cat thinking I’m a blanket thinking I’m a pillow, or…

Philosophy always makes me sleepy.

That’s not philosophy, he really doesn’t know.

Did somebody say Sun Tzu?

What did I do in a previous life to deserve these bozos. Sigh.

What we have here is an impasse.

Am passing through dis box right now.

That is not what that means.

Did somebody say “box”?

I think they did. Boxing day!

You know what?

Chicken butt?

Okay, that’s it! I’ve had just about enough of you!

Did I miss my cue for the butt joke?

Now you’re just stringing us along.

I can’t believe my life has come to this.

I hate to complain, but your butt is…not very comfortable.

That is not a sentence that is okay. It’s just not.

Judged by the Boudica and found wanting. Harsh.

But fair.

D’oh!